the gravity left and so

so it's one of the boring lunch when my boss is nt in the office again =.='
at least i still have sth to look forward in the weekend when my acquaintance come frm VN and the very 1st salary of working

well, at moment like right now, i know very well that i'm just absolutely thoroughly a kid inside out =.='
yearning for mom's shelter, wanting to be spoiled and feeling proud of my almost-nothing-at-all achievement -.-
like how i manage to endure all this wth-i-have-to-do-this face, like stopping myself frm throwing tantrum and stomping my feet ard like when i was home
like refraining frm complaining of all the mundane listless housework and whining from the bottomless boredom
there's nothing much i'd done bt i'm still feeling damn proud of myself =.=' wth is that
is it how an adult supposed to be, refraining themselves from the tiniest motion of emotion and desire
that's why i'd still prefer being a kid
sigh
still i know i need to fence for my own now, and nt just my own
there's respoinsibility for my family and i dont want to be a useless citizen =.=

and with the huge debt, i/m still dreaming on fleeing for Japan for good ><
everything can be faded bt that alone shall not T_T
arghhhhhhhhhhhh
this is yet anothe whining entry ... iknow
oh mr bloggie, you just have to bear w my endless ranting then +_+

btw i borrowed this book called Kinshuu - Autumn brocade =.='
how superficial i am to get a book jst plainly coz of its title =.='
well i guess superficial is a feature attached to hopeless dreamers then +_+
assumption again ahah