永遠と一瞬 ~ moment and eternity

oh it's nothing new
just that i spent another white night on this manga Hoshi wa utau XXD
http://www.onemanga.com/Hoshi_wa_Utau/

it's been quite some time since i read some cute shoujou
The story may be a bit dark and the characters might be a bit typical but it's still damn cute =.='
why am i still w shoujou hahah
but i like how the mangaka made all the development of characters, progress of feelings,...
among tons of things we want to convey, things we think should not let others bother of, unspoken feelings, subtle signs... maybe it's not all that complicated if we should just give it a try
if there's no sign no one's gonna understand a thing you see
and even if it's just a few simple words, it already shows your effort, your care, your courage to step up and to take the risk
may be it does give you chance to offer someone a way to your heart, or vice versa, to let yourself enter someone else's personal world...
so the the whole manga (op to now) is probably around that... and how the gap between reality and ideal is jsut so gravely hurtful...
or that's at least what i think

haha the mangaka is the one who draw Fruits basket as well
making wanting to read fruits basket again haha
who knows i may appreciate it more now that i'm this hyper overoptimistic girl =.='

and why do i still like kakkoii guys in manga T_T i mean either really kakkoii or those who acts cold coz they're just clumsy to show their feelings =)))
bt i know those types never draws my attention in real life =.='
why? superficial =.='
maybe i have different personalities in virtual world and in reality ahah
great no i have no idea what nonsense i'm blabbing abt haha
well in Hoshi ha utau, i like Kanade... he resembles Kouichi somehow XXXD Kouichi in Cat street hahaha
both of them are really cuteeeeeeeee hahaha
there i go, fangirl-ing again =.=

oh and there's this supporting character that i really like as well.
she was a ojou san, kind of rich and happily born girl but she's utterly selfish and superficial and had the worst of temper haha
but she's cute in her own way, daring in her own way, controlling in her own way and it all makes her a supportive and interesting friend lol
anw Hoshi ha utau is really cute haha
that's it >.<

oh btw the house i'm staying is damn irritating =.='
now they started to wake up early and be damn noisy and turned off the aircon at the same time =.='
like hell anyone can continue to sleep in that state. and it always gets noisy ard 5.30am and aircon is off at 6am T_T
haizzzzzz i know that i'm bitchy but T_T
even though i'm nt the type who slept in bt at least it'sholiday and 6am is too darn early to wake up dont u think T_T
at least have some consideration =.='

lastly my sis 's gonna have the university entrance exam soon
hope she'll be doing well
that's all
i'm still damn useless b-(



this song just always touches me to the core >.<
it's alreay difficult to just keep everything going normally... extremely
but still the color of hope is the sky color and so keep going on ~
it's really nice
the title of the song means A moment and Enternity

トトロ～夢の世界へ

haha just watched TOtoro XXXD
it must have been my 1000 times saying this but Ghibli's works are really my dream world XXD
beatiful and magical and pure
my gosh this is 24 yrs old girl talking about anime meant for 4~7 yrs old =.='
haha whatever but i just really really love it
the breath-taking nature, the mysterious creatures, the pure hearts of children,
the curiosity, the imagination
everything is delicately weaven with the vibrant colors and beautiful melody.

It's really like いつも心を踊る夢を見たい
awww you see i always end up crying watching Ghibli's, like feeling touched being able to reunite with the beautiful fantasy world, overwhelmed with its lively imagination and pureness XD
Ghibli's XXXD
i'll earn money to buy all of it XXXD
ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh
hahah
well talking about job, somehow it's the topic of me and my frens these days...
making me feel so old and mature haha
automatically makes me think...ahh we reached that age when all the concern of work, family and society coems into the picture...
neee
it's not like i wish i can turn back the time that i dont have to be burden with it but i just somehow wish even if everyone has to work and be a grown-up, we can still keep our friendship and can still sit down once in a while chatting randomly about life and stuff
that'll be fun for sure.

anw abt job, yes i dont wanna go back to VN just yet
...like i just have the feeling once i'm back, i wont be able to go anywhere else but stay in VN for good T_T
and it wont do anygood for my dream
somehow i jsut have the feeling that i wont have to try as hard as i'm here in singapore when i go back to VN. and so i still wanna stay here seeking for chances to go elsewhere... to Japan haha
well let's see what good i can make out of it

anw... i will still have to try harder!!!
ganbatte~

Ohchan mo ganbatte ne ~ :X

on my endless obssession

=.= what i'm doing these days are pretty ridiculous @_@
i mean esp for someone who hasnt secured a job and broke like me
...
basically i'm jsut falling to fan fiction all over again @_@
i mean there's a time when i'm truly addicted to fan fiction haha
but that was when i was utterly free
...then and again i'm quite free now without job T_T
and this time i gave it a try writing fan fiction myself ^:)^
haha see what i'm getting myself in to LOL
so it makes me think maybe in future I'll do master course on Japanese media and fan culture XXD
it's pretty interesting rite ^O^
just that before being able to do anything, I should work and earn money 1st ^:)^
then i would be able to take that master course and live somewhere else, not tropical countries hopefully hhaa
i'm pretty optimistic aint I?
i mean for someone who has no job, no money and in debt like me T_T
well ... it is said that I should be patient and doing things with care this year... so i'm supposed to be patient looking for a jopb as well i guess
even though beingbroke seriously depresses you loads T_T

and maybe in the near future, i'll try drawing as well @_@
crazy girl rite haha =.=
man i need money T_T

oh and currently I'm all over Code Geass and Tokyo Babylon haha (basically it's the result of reading too much fan fiction of these 2 series @_@)
and i know it's disturbing bt I only read shounen-ai fanfic T_T
=))
well whatever
I'm listening to this song haha
pretty hooked to it coz it just fits the mood while reading code geass fanfic
btw i'm writing Code Geass fan fic as well
it's here if you have any interest
http://login.fanfiction.net/story/story_preview.php?storyid=6053354&chapter=1
and it's shounen-ai haha XD
omg i cant believe myself T_T

blah =.= manga and anmag

i'm just escaping reality rite
i know it's pathetic T_T bt i need to come out with a solution 1st =.=
but manga in its own way reminds me of my problems haha
it's just growing up, encouter, accompanionship, farewell, career.... LIFE
i always fret graduating to be honest and now it does come true
just coz it marks the like of 'shakaijin'... can be translated as adult with responsibility to family and society
and no more excuse for irresponsibility or slack
in my perception

and what i dislike the most is the connection of people and people
just exactly how most of mine is up until now in my life
except for my parents and my sister, there's no other guaranteed relationship... or they're just too frail to withstand space, distance and time

everyone is crossing your life without you having any say in it
like any inevitable things in life
or maybe your decision doesnt make much difference =.= ... coz it's nt strong enough

though people is desperately seeking life-time companionship
most of us scare commitment and trust ... one way or another
after all there really is no guarantee haha
it's people's choice
daring to bet their love and trust or not
even if it hurts
there should be no complaints even if it's nt a right choice rite
the decision is after all ...yours to make
shouldnt dump it all on situation and circumstances

haha maybe's that why i want to have children LOL
coz other than that, nothing feels sustainable enough
... see no matter how idealistic i am, i cant believe that easy in ideal world haha

a little bit more...
haiz

Abe Miyuki's manga is nice
building on relationship btw people and people... how stranger and stranger might just devote themself unconditionally and daringly without any regrets
and i respect any mangaka who put efforts in all the tiny details of their drawings
spectacular and meticulous
ok that's it for an entry
see you some time soon mr bloggies hehe




the song is about a girl's endless wonder of life, of dreams, of growing up,of living, of farewell...
so i find it really moving
maa somehow the more grown up i am, the more of a crybaby i am =.=
haha maybe i overcame the feeling of how uncool crying is
it's jsut showing your emotion a bit more openly and there's nothing wrong with such
though maybe crying out loud is still nt acceptable for me hahaha =.=